Hey there,

I found love..

in a kiwi ūüėÄ

I was doing a fruit salad for me and suddenly I realized that I see hearts , couldn’t believe it.

The kiwi was showing me love.

I was cleaning a kiwi and when I finished it I started to slice it.

Whit every slice I cut from the kiwi I felt that that kiwi wanted to show me something, I felt it in my hand ( he was very wet, more than normal ) .

I didn’t give any attention because I thought that it is something natural, I didn’t think that that kiwi had a crush on me.

Ok, I finished to slice it and then I saw …(¬†lights, fireworks, trumpets ) I saw the heart of that kiwi, so beautiful, so perfect, just in his middle body, with a perfect shape and in each slice was the same heart, for me. I felt in love almost immediately. Couldn’t believe that a fruit can love a human then suddenly I heard something, first was slowly but with more attention that I gave I could hear more clear .. I turned around but couldn’t figure out where the sounds came. Paying more attention to the sound I could hear


Turned around once again but nobody was there .. then I heard

” Hey , down here “

I looked back and I looked down, I could only see .. my dog , who wanted something to eat.

I gave him some food and I heard once more

” leave that stupid dog , look here in the plate “

For a second I thought that I need to see a psychiatrist because I was hearing voices in my head but immediately I woke up to reality by reason of that I heard more words..

I watch the plate, I freak out .. the kiwi had an angry face and his sides that looked like arms were in his hips, like my mother when I didn’t get the garbage outside after I told she that I will do it.

I panicked normal, when this happens I don’t receive pocket-money and I suffer until I will do good things to redeem my mistake.

In that moment when I realized that I did a mistake I came and I said :

” Hey there, I’m sorry that I let you wait but this dog needed to be feed , forgive me please “

In my mind sound that good that I had an expression on my face that betray my lie. Then the kiwi said:

” What the fuck man ? You think if I am a kiwi I could not realize the difference of a lie ?¬†


¬†I couldn’t believe it .. I thought that my mother reincarnated in that kiwi to tell me a lesson or something that I will not understand as usual but want to bother me and ruin my appetite to eat a fruit salad.

” what you say to me ? “

” Shit , he heard me “

” if I am a fruit you think that I haven’t years ? or you think that I can’t understand what are you saying ? by the way your vocabulary it is very rich “

” You shouldn’t talk like that , If I was your mother I beat you so hard that when you will open your mouth next time it will come outside butterflies. “

What my chickens? he is worse my mother.. Immediately I had an idea.

Every time when my mother it is angry on me I apologize and I will say that next time will not more happen.

Yes, a very good idea I thought.

” I apologize for that and I promise that will not happen again¬†“

” Ha Ha ha , not only that you are defiled at mouth but you are an idiot to “

What ? I was so amazed that didn’t work. With my mother every time worked, what happened ?

” I said that if I was your mother but I’m not so don’t came at me with that bullshit that you are sorry and will not happen again, Ha Ha ha you are funny . You think that I will give up at this ? Ha HA ha , you’re so wrong. I could be your father boy “

What my gun? now my mother and my father are reincarnated in this kiwi, no couldn’t be .. it will be so wrong and so bad for me. My parents in a kiwi, I could live with that but Really God , in a kiwi ? in my favorite fruit ? ( I was¬†watching the ceiling like I watched the God’s reaction and he could see what misery provoked to me)

In my mind was : ”¬†God, why you did that.. you know that I like kiwi very much and you know that I can live with my parents living in a kiwi but I can’t promise that I will not eat them .. Why God you¬†brought¬†to me this misery.. ( I knelt keeping eyes on the ceiling, my hands brought¬†together like I was prepared to pray and an expression on my face like I loosed the most important thing for me ) ¬†and shouted ¬†WHY GOD , WHY THIS WORLD IS SO CRUEL ” , of course this happened in my mind. Suddenly the kiwi woke my up from my dreaming.

” Mate, wake up , don’t worry I just joking with you “

” What ? “

” It was funny , Ha ha haaa , if you could see your face , haa ha haaa “

” You bastard “

” Chill out man I just kidding don’t take it personally “

Don’t take it personally ? I think to give you to my dog and then we will see what happen, Ha Ha Haaa “

” Wait man, please, don’t do that .. the tongue of the dog it is so rough and he will not eat me he will just lick me and that it makes a junk of me... please man , you are a good man. ¬†I know you will not do that “

” Ok , let’s see what you have to say ”¬†

I forgot that I was talking with a  kiwi ..

” Thank you man , you are so good but in the same tame you are so fucking idiot , you have a big head and the pimples of your face are like a volcano that it is ready to erupt, Ha ha haaaa and beside this you are ugly to , Ha haaa ha haaa ” ¬† ( ¬†he was tumbling in the plate, he was held on his belly, that hard he was laughing, good that it was a small plate otherwise he fall of it.)

” You piece of shit ” and suddenly I take a slice of the entire and gave it to the dog ( the kiwi began to laugh heartily )

” Haaaaa , Haa , Haaaaa “

” You are an idiot , Ha haaa haaa “

” I can’t feel anything, haaa haa haaa . How could I survive the slice if I had felt something ? “

” You are so stupid , Haaaaa haaa haaaaa “

I was so angry that I didn’t know what to do with him, I had a red face, the comes where out like a swollen river water..

” Haaa haaa haaaaa , now you are more funny , Haaa haaa haaa , you look like a halloween pumpkin, what did you do with your face ? Haaa haaa haa .

Wait , wait , I know with who you look right now , you look like Hellboy¬†, Haaaaaaa Haaaa Haaaaa “

” You asshole I’m going to throw you at the trash “

” Wait, wait, wait ! don’t rush “

” No way “ and I put my hands on the plate where the kiwi had tumbling for a few minutes.

” Wait !!! I LOVE YOU MAN “

” Haaa Ha haa , you think that I will fall into this trap once again ? “

” It’s true , I tell the truth “

In this moment I put the plate down on the table and see what he had to say this time but I was decided to throw him at the trash if he say something wrong or something that I didn’t like.

” Ok, so ?

” Good, you decided to not throw me out, My heart almost stopped when you raised the plate “

That was true , I could see that his heart was tight like a raisin and still squeezing. This was a reason that I put him back to the table. My heart was moved..

” You are not safe yet, I decided to throw you if you will say something foolish ”¬†

Saying what I have said I saw that his heart was becoming back at how he looked first time.

“Thank you, you are so kind with me, a humble kiwa “

” Can you come closer, please ? “

” Why ? “

” I want to tell you something and I want to hear just you and nobody else “

” I don’t trust you, if you want to say something say it right here, right now “

” I can’t say it out loud because the dog has a fine hearing and still if I will say at your ear I can’t say that the dog will not hear what I say, dirty dog ( he said that for him but I heard him )¬†.. ”

” What you say ?

Now you mess with my dog, you have a lot of nerve to say that in my house and in face of my dog. 

You think that I have more trust in you than in my dog ? You are mad to think at that . Haa ha haa “

” I didn’t want to say that “

” No, no, no, you said exactly what you wanted to say “

” Indeed, but I need to say that just to you, please have faith in me “

” Haa Haa Haa , in you ? I don’t trust in you after what you’ve done “

” Please man, I’m begging you “ ( and he put on his knees, you can imagine a kiwi on his knees in front of me¬†and begging at me,¬†my ego was tickled )

” Ok kiwa, you have twenty seconds but if you will do anything foolish you will be out in a second ”¬†

” Thank you, you are a great man Pattrick “

” Ye , ye , let’s hear what you have to say”

I felt that something was wrong because the kiwi were rubbing his hands in front of him like a man who want to do something rascally, that gave me a little to think but I approached him slowly like something strange will happen.

I was like a few centimeters on the table, I turned my head with my ear oriented to the kiwa I have seen my dog making big eyes while my ear was closer and closer the kiwa. Suddenly ( while I watching the dog and sharpening my hearing to listen what the kiwi wanna say ) my dog changed his view from me to a few centimeters left where the kiwi were sitting and at a clap he jumped to me, keeping the view at the kiwi. A few hundredths later I felt a luscious thing entering in my ear ( my dog was so close to me in the air that in one-two seconds he will be on me) . When I felt the kiwa in my year I saw my dog writhing in the air and heard :

” You are so fucked up , Haaaa , Haaa , Haaa “

I hadn’t time to get into my senses because my dog slammed me down

” Haaaaaa , haaa , haaaaa.

¬†Yes, haaaa , you haaaa , are hahhaa , an hhhaa , idiot haaaaahhhhaahhhaaa ¬†“

” How could you be so gullible, so naive ? haaahha “

In this while my dog was on top of me and we were falling, we were almost embraced during the fall. His face expressed a terrible surprise, he had very big black eyes and they glittered so much that I thought he was thinking :

” I’m sorry , I didn’t want to tear you down ”

and my eyes where saying to him

” I know, don’t worry “


This is the end of the Part 1 

Hope to enjoy this story ūüėÄ

I have the rest of the story in my mind but it is late and I want to let me know if I did a good job with this part.

If you like my story please let me know , that will make me write the part 2 maybe and the part 3 – 4 and more.

Please give me a feed-back and let me know 

I need this 


 Paul R.

had wrote.. ¬†ūüôā¬†

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